International Lose Your Keys Day?

So, it wasn't just Uiscebot who lost his keys this morning. Nope, a similar drama was unfolding a few miles away in sunny (aka wet and murky) Beech Grove. All the kids ready, we might just have been leaving in time to get to school before the bell for once, but where the bloody hell were my keys?? I never lose them. Frantic calls to hubby - which is the usual waste of time as he obviously has a religious belief banning him from answering his mobile, especially when his desperate wife rings multiple times.

On a normal morning I wouldn't be too concerned with missing keys - my kids are so phenomenally brilliant that they can afford to miss a little bit of school. But no, of course this morning eldest child had a school trip to the National Gallery.

I rang a cab. I couldn't believe I was going to have to get a taxi to get the kids to school. But of course, the magic of abandoning the search worked and the keys started yelling at me from the bottom of a little used bag. Teasing mo fo's!!!!

Quick call to cancel the cab (as I am such a nice person.) Fecked the kids in the car. Go! Go! Go! We're ten minutes late... Hurl the kids into school. I then spent 50 minutes sitting outside the school waiting to see if the bus would turn up or if poor child had missed his trip. Why did I wait? Couldn't I have just gone in and found out? I think I was so wound up by the horror that I would have been like a crazy woman.

For I am a crazy woman.

The end.

Ps When child got home from trip to the National Gallery all he could do was giggle about the pictures of naked people. Sigh.

International Lose Your Keys Day?

So, it wasn't just Uiscebot who lost his keys this morning. Nope, a similar drama was unfolding a few miles away in sunny (aka wet and murky) Beech Grove. All the kids ready, we might just have been leaving in time to get to school before the bell for once, but where the bloody hell were my keys?? I never lose them. Frantic calls to hubby - which is the usual waste of time as he obviously has a religious belief banning him from answering his mobile, especially when his desperate wife rings multiple times.

On a normal morning I wouldn't be too concerned with missing keys - my kids are so phenomenally brilliant that they can afford to miss a little bit of school. But no, of course this morning eldest child had a school trip to the National Gallery.

I rang a cab. I couldn't believe I was going to have to get a taxi to get the kids to school. But of course, the magic of abandoning the search worked and the keys started yelling at me from the bottom of a little used bag. Teasing mo fo's!!!!

Quick call to cancel the cab (as I am such a nice person.) Fecked the kids in the car. Go! Go! Go! We're ten minutes late... Hurl the kids into school. I then spent 50 minutes sitting outside the school waiting to see if the bus would turn up or if poor child had missed his trip. Why did I wait? Couldn't I have just gone in and found out? I think I was so wound up by the horror that I would have been like a crazy woman.

For I am a crazy woman.

The end.

Ps When child got home from trip to the National Gallery all he could do was giggle about the pictures of naked people. Sigh.

Mobsters

I asked my eight year old yesterday how he found the work at school (I'm trying to work out whether he is a misunderstood genius or a total chancer.) He said..

"I listen to it, and bada bing, I remember it."

Total chancer then...

Ah, they've taken my youth, my looks, my slimline waistline, but at least they're good for a laugh once in a while.

Mobsters

I asked my eight year old yesterday how he found the work at school (I'm trying to work out whether he is a misunderstood genius or a total chancer.) He said..

"I listen to it, and bada bing, I remember it."

Total chancer then...

Ah, they've taken my youth, my looks, my slimline waistline, but at least they're good for a laugh once in a while.

Obamamania!

Kids enjoyed the inauguration. Well, older son did, but half way through younger son started doing half cartwheels around the living room floor. And I don't think they were his expression of his joy at this historical watershed moment. Just bored I guess. When you're six there's nothing revolutionary about what Obama had to say - of course he's going to do his best. Of course he's going to do the right thing. Isn't that how life works?



Now a poem to mark the occasion...

Feelings and Thoughts On the Occasion of Barack Obama Becoming the 44th President of the United States of American.

Stumbled Oath.
Hopefully the only
slip up
of his reign.

Obamamania!

Kids enjoyed the inauguration. Well, older son did, but half way through younger son started doing half cartwheels around the living room floor. And I don't think they were his expression of his joy at this historical watershed moment. Just bored I guess. When you're six there's nothing revolutionary about what Obama had to say - of course he's going to do his best. Of course he's going to do the right thing. Isn't that how life works?



Now a poem to mark the occasion...

Feelings and Thoughts On the Occasion of Barack Obama Becoming the 44th President of the United States of American.

Stumbled Oath.
Hopefully the only
slip up
of his reign.

Yes we can...I think.

As the great Homer Simpson said, "Kids are great. You can teach them to hate what you hate and, with the Internet and all, they practically raise themselves."



I like to live these words, and its good sometimes to see them bear fruit. I was trying to explain the concept of the suspension of habeas corpus, in relation specifically to Guantanamo Bay, to the boys (ages 6 and 8), while driving them to school the other morning. I wasn't sure if I was getting the subtleties of it across. But I knew I had succeeded when younger son asked if they would exile George Bush once Obama came to power. I sighed, and said, 'Son, you have the right idea, and in many parts of the world they would, but sadly, no. He'll just go back to his ranch.'

They seemed a little disappointed.

Next week we start on the much anticipated lecture series for kiddies entitled 'Why Israel is a great big smelly head.'

Anyway, we'll all sit down tomorrow afternoon and watch the inauguration. Hopefully in the future, when they're all growed up, they'll remember fondly this historic time. Maybe the world they grow up in will be a safer fairer place.



Sure!